


Merry Christmas, Amigo!

by Whisper132



Category: Engine Sentai Go-Onger
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-15
Updated: 2009-01-15
Packaged: 2017-10-23 13:08:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/250628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whisper132/pseuds/Whisper132
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Renn does not approve of Hanto's holiday job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Merry Christmas, Amigo!

There were several reasons Renn disapproved of Hanto's new part time job. First, the job put Hanto perilously close to several desperate housewives. Second, it put Hanto perilously close to desperate housewives while wearing naught but a jerkin and tights. Third, Renn was the only Santa that Hanto was allowed to play Elf to, and the skeezy old guy in the suit was pissing Renn off. If the old man asked Hanto to "sit on Santa's lap" again, Renn and he were going to have words. Renn's words would be Garage Launcher, possibly followed by Buson Missile.

It was all the Evil Orca's idea. He saw a program on TV and was determined to find a Mrs. Claus. After some internet research conducted by Sousuke (under orders from Speedor who "owed me one, amigo"), Hanto was now employed at the only mall in Japan that featured a Western style "Sit With Santa" exhibit. To protect Hanto's modesty (what little was left after the tights), Renn accompanied him to work daily.

"Mom, that man's scary." A little girl tugged at her mother's sleeve and pointed to Renn. Renn tried to smile back but his attempt at kindness was met with a shriek.

"This was a bad idea," Buson said, engine soul flittering about in front of Renn's face.

"It wasn't my idea." Renn put the soul into his Go Phone. "I wanted him to stay home and clean."

"I wonder why that didn't work," Buson mumbled. Renn's life would go much more smoothly if his engine aibou would offer constructive comments instead of constant sarcasm.

"The job only lasts for two more days." Renn said this not so much for Buson's benefit as for his own growing paranoia. There were a lot of single fathers at the mall. Renn had caught Hanto's eye wandering to the occasional man in aqua skinny jeans. Renn didn't own fashion, just aprons and some polo shirts. Hanto said he liked the polo shirts.

Maybe Renn could slip away and buy something in the clearance section at the UniQlo.

  
*****

  
The tights itched. Hanto wanted to scratch, but he was surrounded by kids and a Santa that really, really freaked him out. The guy in the suit was at least a million years old, and he wanted Hanto to call him Big Red and sit on his lap. No way.

"This bites, amigo." Birca's holographic tail drooped. "No Mrs. Claus anywhere, and all the pretty senoritas went home." All the female elves had quit. The last one left after punching Santa in the gut when he tried to see up her skirt.

Hanto thought of the money and the tool kit that Renn wanted but couldn't afford to get himself. "Just two more days. I've almost saved up enough." He gave Birca a thumbs up and turned off the hologram.

After this job was over, he was telling Gun-nii about the pervy Santa. Gun-nii would take care of Big Red.

  
*****

  
The clearance section was just past a hoard of women clawing one another's eyes out to get to some thermal undershirts. Renn dove into the bin and pulled a shirt out at random.

 _With a breeze like morning…Welcome Home!_ The shirt's text was in English and Renn didn't understand it. The skull design was pretty neat, though, and the shirt was only 250 yen. He put it in his basket.

"Welcome. Can I help you?" A sales lady stood next to Renn, smiling and eyeing his nearly empty basket.

"I'm trying to be more, uh…" Renn pointed toward his basket.

"Fashionable?"

"Yes. More fashionable." Then Renn said something he would only say in a store full of people he didn't know and would never see again. "Can you help me?"

  
*****

  
Finally, after a month of suffering under the lecherous Santa, Hanto was free. He had Renn's tool kit in hand and was joyfully waiting for breakfast to be served before they opened presents. Per Renn's request, Hanto stayed in bed and waited for his very own Christmas elf to serve him.

This was what life was all about.

"Good morning!" Renn walked through the door holding an omelette with a ketchup wreath on it.

"What are you wearing, amigo!?" Hanto didn't realize he'd failed to put Birca's engine soul away after their morning meeting. The soul flipped and flittered its way into Hanto's Shift Changer. "The pants, amigo! What happened to your pants!?"

Renn turned around, showing off a pair of red skinny jeans with bright green vines painted on them. "The girl at the store said they're the latest fashion. How do they look?"

"They look great," Hanto lied, unable to tell Renn that he looked like a circus freak wearing the pants under his usual blue apron.

"There's a shirt, too." Renn set his tray down and quickly removed the apron to reveal a white t-shirt with gold and silver lettering.

"Ridiculous, isn't it?" Buson's hologram jumped out of Renn's Go Phone. "I tried to stop him."

"Oh, _amigo,_ " Birca sighed, shaking his head.

Hanto squinted and tried to make out the words on the shirt. "With…pleasure…soft…monkey…cr-crave…the sweet…ghost…life." He blinked. "With pleasure soft monkey crave the sweet ghost life? What does it mean?"

"It's foreign for 'the person wearing this shirt is an idiot,'" Buson grumbled.

Birca continued to shake his head.

"I got you this!" Hanto rushed forward with Renn's present, hoping to change the subject. He'd hide the fashion later while Renn was out playing with his tools.

"Psst, amigo." Birca floated up next to Hanto's ear. "If he likes cosplay so much, we could get him that Mrs. Claus outfit we saw."

"It would be better than the jeans," Hanto replied.

"And the same colors," Birca whispered.

"Think he'd wear it?"

"Look at him!" Birca nodded toward where Renn was snuggling a ratchet to his sweet ghost life. "He'll do anything, amigo."

"Uh, I'll be right back. I need to go get something." Hanto and Birca left at a run. Renn, still snuggling his tools, didn't notice at thing.

  


  
[   
](http://www.statcounter.com/myspace/)   


  



End file.
